His parents are mad because a supermarket won't personalize a cake for their three-year-old son, Adolph Hitler Campbell. The store says it's in bad taste to send birthday wishes to Adolph Hitler.

When asked for comment, his younger siblings, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, said "cookie!" and "aiiieee!", respectively.

From a longer article about the family:

The Campbells said they wanted their children to have unique names and didn't expect the names to cause problems.

Duh.

Battlestar Galactica returns one month from today!

There's an Elvis movie quiz over at Any Major Dude With Half A Heart. I don't think I've ever seen a single Elvis movie, so I'll take the zero. But, the clues are funny to me, because of their wacky 60's Pick-A-Premise-From-A-Hat absurdity:

• Elvis is a singing heir to a pineapple plantation in Hawaii ...
• Elvis is a singing swimming pool lifeguard who couldn’t cut it in the circus.
• Elvis is a singing rodeo rider
• Elvis is a singing bush pilot who takes care of a little Chinese kid.
• Elvis is a singing rodeo rider (again), but with an ethnic twist: he is of Native-American descent.
• Elvis is a ghetto doctor who doesn’t sing an awful lot. But he falls in love.
• ... and my favorite: Elvis is a singing insurance salesman who moonlights as a lion tamer and falls in love with the circus clown’s daughter.

Yes, I know Elvis didn't sing "Vehicle" (but he could have).

WMD Found In Iraq

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Riots, Nuclear Holocaust, Sorry Obama

The Sun:

THE star of top German TV showThe Farmer Wants A Wife has been accused by animal rights charity Peta of sexually abusing his chickens.

Gah. Fucking PETA.

Seventy-one-year-old nudist Hansi was shown using his finger to sexually stimulate his female birds on the final episode, broadcast on Monday night to 8.6million viewers.

He explained: “I do what the cockerel would usually do, only with my finger. It is like an orgasm for the chicken.”

The gruff farmer added: “Hansi is always happy when the chickens are happy.”

What's German for "Bookmobile" ?

KYLE: Woa dude! It's the bookmobile driver!!

BARBRADY: Caught you red handed!!

BOOKMOBILE DRIVER: Indeed you did!! How did you know I would strike here?

BARBRADY: By reading Teetle the Timid Taxidermist!

BOOKMOBILE DRIVER: YOU DID?! REALLY?! THEN IT WORKED!! MY WHOLE PLAN WORKED ABSOLUTELY PERFECTLY!!!

STAN: What are you talking about dude?

BOOKMOBILE DRIVER: When I heard that Officer Barbrady couldn't read, I knew I had to motivate him somehow! So I formulated a plan to encourage him to learn the magic of reading!!

KYLE: So you fucked a bunch of chickens?

BOOKMOBILE DRIVER: YES! YES! EXACTLY!!! Don't you see, only by fucking chickens could I get Officer Barbrady to become literate!

Everyone thinks, and tries to make this make sense.