"The more toppings a man has on his pizza, I believe the more manly he is," said the former Godfather's Pizza CEO.
Cain, laughing, then explained that "the more manly man is not afraid of abundance" before calling into question the manliness of a pizza with vegetables on it.
"A manly man don't want it piled high with vegetables! He would call that a sissy pizza," Cain said.
Presidential!
"The more manly man is not afraid of abundance." That's awesome.
I am not afraid of abundance! I am the More Manly Man!
Oof. I’m a plain cheese pizza guy.
Keep back. My sissyness will rub off on you.
How can anyone take Cain seriously? What a jackass.
Ah, I love The Onion. Wait…