A while back, over at Making Light, there was a discussion about making a flu-preparedness package for yourself (back when bird flu seemed like it was mere days from killing us all). During a mini-discussion of cough medicines, I remembered something the school nurse used to give me for asthma, back when I was seven or eight: a noxious yellow syrup called Quibron.
Quibron is a blend of guaifenesin (an expectorant found in most cough medicines - yum) and theophylline (which expands airways). It tastes horrible. Beyond awful. I remarked on Making Light, that Quibron tasted like "Robitussin triple-distilled over a tire fire then aged for 12 years in casks of piss oak". I probably should have added "with a splash of cat piss" in addition to the Robitussin, to give it a little more of a pungent, up-front bite. Horrible. Luckily, I haven't had any since I was a wee lad.
[...dissolve to present - colors brighter, focus sharper...]
I bought a bottle of Laphroaig ("la-froyg") this weekend. It's a single-malt Scotch, from the island of Islay. I'd never tasted it before, but I like trying new things so I took a chance. As soon as the first drop hit my tounge, I thought of Quibron. Laphroaig is smokey, but not in a nice wood-smoke-on-a-cold-night way; this is more like burning plastic (peat, actually). It's medicinal. It's chemical. It's offensive. It tastes like some kind of industrial cleaner. Instead of inspiring romantic visions of the Isles off Scotland, it conjures nightmares of industrial Britain: an afternoon spent near a burning paint factory by the sea. And yet, somehow, I enjoy it - after the first few sips, anyway. Though maybe I'm just convincing myself I like it so I don't feel bad about the price. Next time, though, I'll buy an old standby, like Macallan or Glenlivet, or Knob Creek.
haha, I wonder how the distillery would react to that description of their pride and joy. It is quite a well regarded whisky and I rather like it. Though I do prefer Glenlivet.
hah. i’m sure they’d (correctly) say that i’m a novice when it comes to Scotch.
i read a few other reviews before posting this, just to make sure i didn’t have a bad bottle or some kind of neural disorder that caused me to taste things differently than everyone else. but it turns out my assessment was pretty much on the money: they all agree that Laphroaig has a decidedly smoky taste (peat smoke, not wood smoke), a medicinal (also “iodine”) quality, salty (also “brine”) – also tastes of “tar”, “fish”, etc.. the only real difference is that some people really like all that a lot more than i do.
but, i’ll drink it, in time. and maybe by the end of the bottle, i’ll come to appreciate it more.
Ah, I say just enjoy what you enjoy. There is so much choice in whisky one can’t like them all. I really don’t like Glenfiddich even though it is highly regarded.
Though it was interesting doing a whisky tour in Scotland the other year. We tasted several and were shown how to know where each came from based on the unique tastes of peat, citrus, oak, vanilla and so on. Definitley something to try once.
i’d love to go to Scotland – not just for the whisky, but for the shortbread and the deep-fried everythings, too. :)
I’ve been to Scotland. Go there, please. You owe it to yourself.
someday, i will. someday.
and then they’ll pay. they’ll all pay.
Oban. imagine a dry (unsweet, not all crumblied and stuff) Heath bar. that’s kind of it.
too bad I can’t fford it.
i had a bottle of Oban a few years ago. i liked it. i think i remember it being saltier than Glenlivet, but still on the mild side – not like agressive like Laphroaig.