{"id":708,"date":"2005-08-02T11:03:18","date_gmt":"2005-08-02T11:03:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cleek.lunarpages.com\/blogs\/?p=708"},"modified":"2005-08-02T11:03:18","modified_gmt":"2005-08-02T11:03:18","slug":"faux-faulkner","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/?p=708","title":{"rendered":"Faux Faulkner"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Here's a bit from the winner of the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.hemispheresmagazine.com\/contests\/2005\/faulkner.htm\">2005 Faux Faulkner Contest<\/a>:<\/p>\n<ul>We walked down steps to the office. There were paintings of old people on the walls and the room was round like a circle and Condi was sitting on my desk. Her legs were crossed. <\/p>\n<p>\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Did you get him ready for the press conference?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Dick said. <\/p>\n<p>\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Dont you worry about him. He ll be ready,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Condi said. Condi stood up from the desk. Her legs were long and she smelled like the Xeroxed copies of the information packets they give me each day. <\/p>\n<p>\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hello Georgie,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Condi said. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Did you come to see Condi?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Condi rubbed my hair and it tickled. <\/p>\n<p>\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Dont go messing up his hair,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Dick said. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hes got a press conference in a few minutes.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d <\/p>\n<p>Condi wiped some spit on her hand and patted down my hair. Her hand was soft and she smelled like Xerox copies coming right out of the machine. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153He looks just fine,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Condi said. <\/ul>\n<p>Read the rest, as they say. It's brilliant.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Here's a bit from the winner of the 2005 Faux Faulkner Contest: We walked down steps to the office. There were paintings of old people on the walls and the room was round like a circle and Condi was sitting on my desk. Her legs were crossed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Did you get him ready for the press [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-708","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/708","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=708"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/708\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=708"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=708"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ok-cleek.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=708"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}