The Insane Conspiracy Theories You Hear in Prison

In case Friday had lightened your mood…

The library clerk goes on to tell me that sovereign citizens don’t have to pay taxes because of the “straw man” theory. The explanation of this is convoluted and takes a while for my brain to process. But the idea is that all humans have two personas, a legal entity and their physical self, and the latter is not responsible for the debts or taxes of the former.

Yet the IRS is very aware of the “straw man” theory and will fine an individual who uses it $5,000 for filing a “frivolous tax return.”

I try to explain this, but to no avail.

“Just write the word Frank where the stamp goes,” I hear another inmate telling a friend in the library.

I have to ask what he is talking about. He tells me that it is common knowledge that a very wealthy man named Frank died and donated his millions of dollars to the U.S. Postal Service. Now all poor people have to do is write his name on an envelope in place of a stamp, and the mail will be delivered for free.

Many prisoners swear they have used this method, and that it works.

1 thought on “The Insane Conspiracy Theories You Hear in Prison

  1. Countme-a-Demon

    I think those in the know call that “franking privileges”.

    Ladies and gentleman, I give you Trump’s new Postmaster General on the blower to the President:

    America’s light goes out with one lifted butt cheek and a stifled giggle from the wag at the back of the class.

Comments are closed.